Thursday, April 30, 2009

You Need to Be Able to Help Yourself , before Helping Others

Make Sure You're in the Right State of Mind before You Start to Help Other People, maybe you should watch this video, it could change your life by changing your thinking.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing and personal development.

Would you still be reading this article, if you had no desire, for better life. Find out more by visiting a place to develop some life changing skills .

How To Create Good Habits

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Living a Life of Regret

Emily Dickinson wrote, "Remorse is cureless, the disease not even God can heal." 'Remorse' arises as a sorrow for past decisions that you've made, while 'regret' serves as a broader, more useful term, describing a wish that you'd made other choices in the past: choices either to avoid doing something that you've done or to do something that you avoided. At their root, the two emotions are practically synonymous. They're both cases of feeling sad because of choices that you made once upon a time.

As the disappointments that characterize the midlife transition slowly strip away the feelings of achievement, success and personal adequacy that used to keep you going as a mere adult, oftentimes what remains - like grounds stuck to the bottom of a drained coffee mug - are all your regrets: "I wish I hadn't done that;" "I wish I hadn't said that to him/her;" "If only I'd listened to him/her;" "I shouldn't have passed up that opportunity." Regret, exposed by present disappointments, leaves you pining over a lifetime of unfortunate detours and roads not taken. No wonder the midlife transition feels so depressing!

Good news! There exists a road out of regret. It begins, as every significant life-altering decision must, with a change of heart and mind. To shift from living a life of sadness, guilt, self-recrimination, and regret, you don't have to do anything. All you need to do is to change your mind. I say this very often, but it needs repeating even more often. People like you and me want to make living life harder than it needs to be. Somehow, deep down inside, we carry with us the core belief that, if something isn't gut-wrenchingly hard, it can't be effective. Yet, how many times in the past have you agonized over something that later turned out to be a very simple miscalculation or misunderstanding? It happens all the time. Shockingly, the difference between living a life of fullness and satisfaction and living a life of regret lies entirely in the decision that you make - here and now - about how you're going to think about it.

Many years ago, a mentor of mine gave me a phrase that I've found to be one of the most powerful principles (a mantra, in fact) that you can use to disarm the negativity that almost continually underlies and undermines your decision-making process. The statement itself is simple but very controversial, so I'll need to explain both how to use it and how not to use it. Here's your mantra for today (or any day that you find your life tinged with regret): The decision that you made, at the time you made it, was the right decision for you.

Here's some background that'll help you appreciate how this simple but profound statement can work for you. When you review your past, you're going to find some decisions that turned out badly for you or for others. You're going to be able to see that there were different, even better, decisions that you could have made at the time that might have worked out better for you or for all involved. There's nothing quite like a disastrous result to convince you that another choice might have served you better. When you look back at these painful moments, you'll naturally experience sad feelings around them.

These feelings come in two flavors: guilt and shame. They're very different emotions: guilt arises from a realization that you could have done better; shame suggests that you could have been better. Guilt speaks to your decisions and actions, shame speaks to your being as a person. Guilt is an absolutely necessary emotion that assists you in learning not to make the same mistakes over again. A sociopath is someone who is incapable of feeling true guilt, and therefore never learns 'right from wrong'. Shame, on the other hand, raises doubts about your value and adequacy as a person. Shame, rather than providing you with assistance in moving forward in a more positive direction, causes debilitating doubt. Shame brings with it the terror of making a mistake, and the crisis of self-confidence that paralyzes your entire decision-making process.

Feelings of guilt should lift once your shortcoming has been acknowledged and you have taken steps to correct the situation and you have made an effort to make amends for whatever damage you may have caused. This is the experience of redemption. Shame, on the other hand, illustrates the experience that Emily Dickinson spoke about. Believing that you have a fundamental flaw in your very being not only resists a cure, it also deepens with every mistake you make. Acknowledging that whatever decision you made at the time you made it was the right one for you must not excuse you from guilt: regardless of your good intentions, you still made an error in judgment, culpable or not. This acknowledgment can, however, free you from shame - and the pervasive sense of regret that flows from it.

Here's the point in a nutshell: you have 20/20 hindsight. When you attempt to pass judgment on the decisions you made in the past with the knowledge and experience you have in the present, you're doing yourself a huge injustice. You can't know what you don't know until you know it. The pain you experience around guilt represents a good, positive, forward-moving impetus. Remember, please, that pain only means punishment for children who don't know any better. Once you've reached the midlife transition, you're ready to accept the fact that pain (physical or emotional) only represents the universe trying to get your attention. There's no real shame in pain. For a mature adult, you can learn to embrace the pain and walk through the fear into something more wonderfully positive. You only learn, after all, by your mistakes.

Once again: when you pass judgment on the decisions that you made in the past using the knowledge and experience you have in the present, you're shaming yourself completely unjustly. When that happens, it's time to remind yourself:

The decision that you made, at the time that you made it, was the right decision for you. Breathe it out. Let it go. So long as you've learned from the mistakes of the past, you have no need for regret. Every decision you've made, every experience (both positive and negative) that you've had along the way, has taken you to where you are today and made you the person you are today.

There is no shame in that. In fact, as you transition through midlife, you're going to have the opportunity to feel - and to express - gratitude for every mistake, every wrong turn, every 'sin' that you've experienced in your life. After all, every decision of your life (the unacceptable ones as well as the acceptable ones) has brought you to this moment. And that, dear friend, is a very good thing!

H. Les Brown

H. Les Brown, MA, CFCC
ProActivation Coaching
Website: http://www.MidlifeMaster.com
E-Mail: info@ProActivation.com
Join our weekly EZine (Midlife Matters) and get 7 Spiritual Strategies at no cost:
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Copyright 2008 H. Les Brown

Chakras Book Review

Don't Be Afraid to Ask for Help with Jack Canfield

Creating super habits are easier than you could ever imagine. Most people have something they would like to change in their lives. If you ask anyone, they are usually able to answer this question, "If you could change anything about yourself, what would you change." All the self help and personal development programs and Books available today are full of useful information that nobody seems to take advantage of. You've seen the TV commercials and listen to other people tell their stories, about how they lost weight.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development.

Greg is currently working on a self help video library filled with great movies on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world. His views on religious freedom are slowly changing the way people think about institutional religion.

Secret

Bartimaeus and the Parable of the Pencil - May it Bless You As it Blessed Me and Others Around Me

During what is called 'Holy Week' we have services each evening, and I was asked to conduct and speak at the Tuesday Evening Service this year and was given the theme 'Bartimaeus'.

Bartimaeus was the blind beggar who called out to Jesus Christ as Jesus was passing through Jericho for the final time. Jesus was on His way to Jerusalem to shed His Blood and give His life, as our Passover Lamb. His blood was shed to wash away sin.

Bartimaeus called out and the crowd tried to silence him. It was a noisy procession but Jesus heard the cry for mercy coming from Bartimaeus and he answered that cry - that prayer. He hears the cries of those who are serious and desperate.

He asked Bartimaeus what he wanted done. You would have thought it would have been obvious, but there are times Jesus Christ wants us to spell out our needs, precisely and specifically. As a consequence of his faith in Jesus Bartimaeus was healed and he was able to see and he rose up and followed Jesus.

Bartimaeus put his life in the hands of Jesus Christ. This was his final opportunity as Jesus was never to pass that way again - never! We never know when it is our final opportunity.

All this reminded me of the Parable of the Pencil and I shared it with all those who came to the Tuesday Evening Service.

You will be able to great things if you allow yourself to be held in someone's hand.

You will experience a painful sharpening from time to time, and you will need that to make you a better pencil.

The one who holds you will be able to correct any mistakes you might make.

You may be painted and shiney on the outside but the most important part of you is what is inside.

On every surface where you are to be used, leave your mark! Continue to write!

It is only a Parable but a Parable is a story with spiritual implications and a profound spiritual dimension.

When called and healed by Jesus, Bartimaeus rose up and followed Jesus and placed his life in hands of Jesus Christ. Now, there is a tremendous security there. It takes courage to do that and it involves commitment. It may be the result of a decision - not in an emotional moment - although emotion will undoubtedly be present.

A man has to be determined to rise up and follow. Some may come to regard you as a pest and nuisance as they had regarded Bartimaeus.

When Bartimaeus rose up to follow Jesus we are told he threw off his old coat. Did he ever return to that old coat? I don't think so. That was a symbol of his previous way of life. When Jesus touches you and calls you and you rise up and follow Him, never consider for a single moment of returning to your former way of life with all its sadness and traps and snares and nets and sin.

What a future he had! I am sure that when he arose that morning and was led out to the place to beg he never dreamt that by evening he would be able to see and that his whole life would be totally transformed, as he set out following Jesus Christ, the Son of God.

This is not a parable. This is reality.

Sandy Shaw.

Sandy Shaw is Pastor of Nairn Christian Fellowship, Chaplain at Inverness Prison, and Nairn Academy, and serves on The Children's Panel in Scotland, and has travelled extensively over these past years teaching, speaking, in America, Canada, South Africa, Australia, making 12 visits to Israel conducting Tours and Pilgrimages, and most recently in Uganda and Kenya, ministering at Pastors and Leaders Seminars, in the poor areas surrounding Kampala, Nairobi, Mombasa and Kisumu.

He broadcasts regularly on WSHO radio out of New Orleans, and writes a weekly commentary at http://www.studylight.org entitled "Word from Scotland" on various biblical themes, as well as a weekly newspaper column.

His M.A. and B.D. degrees are from The University of Edinburgh, and he continues to run and exercise regularly to maintain a level of physical fitness.

Sandy Shaw
sandyshaw63@yahoo.com

My Childhood Religious Beliefs

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Social Wellness and World Peace Issues - President Barack Obama - Spiritual Meanings of Numbers Pt 1

Caught up in all the issues of the US primary and presidential campaigns, I missed one important element in the entire karmic set-up of this specific election. The position sought was the job of being the 44th President of the United States, emphasis for this article being the forty-fourth.

What is so important with being the forty-fourth President?

It turns out that there are several points to consider about America and its place in the world at this time in history from the point of view of the spiritual significance of numbers.

I will leave the discussion of Barack Obama being the reincarnation of Abraham Lincoln to another article but firstly, forty-four breaks down to the single digit eight when both numbers are added.

Theory and Application of the Spiritual Meaning of Numbers - Eight

Eight is the number of heavy karma. If you are born on the eighth day of the month or your given or preferred name that you use daily reduces to eight, it means that you have extremely important work to do that needs to move forward now.

This is because previous Soul work remained undone and there is now an extra burden of issues to work through and solve in the given time frame. The extra karmic eight vibration helps to ensure that the Soul work to be done in that particular time is in fact accomplished.

With the sweeping electoral victory and the intense, joyful reaction around the world to the election of Barack Obama, it may be fair to say that the majority of American and global citizens feel that Barack Obama has received a critically urgent mandate to manifest the change that was the theme of his campaign.

His supporters may also argue that these issues have become even more critical because of the lack of progress made on them in preceding presidencies.

Change, massive doses of it, to transform important issues that deal with social wellness on the economic, health, educational, regulatory, international and other levels are promised, expected and will be the main criteria upon which the performance of the presidency of Barack Obama will be judged by.

Spiritual Significance of Numbers For Barack Obama Presidency Conclusion

Forty-four, reduced to the number eight, signifying heavy issues, not previously dealt with adequately, that must now be urgently addressed. The destiny of America's place in the world as a leader in the creation of global progress, harmony, worldwide economic, social, educational and political freedom, justice and peace is at stake.

For follow-up articles on the impact of the spiritual meaning of numbers for the Barack Obama presidency, please request the newsletter and obtain automatic access to the Free membership area at the site listed below.

Angela Chen Shui, "the Soul Alignment Coach" has taught social wellness and inducing consciousness techniques to individuals and groups since 1990. For more articles on social wellness world peace issues, Angela invites you to request your own FREE personal values beliefs, social wellness and vibratory stress relief life growth coaching newsletter at:

http://www.SoulSelfHelp.com/index4.html

Copyright 2008 - Angela Chen Shui. All Rights Reserved Worldwide.

Overcoming Limited Beliefs

Video Book Review - The Magic of Beleiving

I don't need to write anything, watch the video, well maybe, this is a wonderful book and I have an on audio. This book could change your life.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development. Check out one of his recommended books, More on Claude Bristol

Greg is currently working on a personal development library filled with great subjects on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world. His views on religious freedom are slowly changing the way people think about institutional religion.

Power Of Positive Thinking

Cigarette Smoking is Caused by a Delusion

I leaned back in my chair and breathed a heavy sigh. My patient, Mr. Rodriguez, noticed my discomfort. "I know I should quit," he told me with a guilty shrug of his shoulders.

"Have you ever tried?" I asked.

"Once," he replied, "but it didn't stick."

Mr. Rodriguez had been a pack-a-day smoker for the past 20 years, something he'd only begrudgingly confessed in response to a standard inquiry I make of all my first time patients. He didn't see it as a problem himself. Or at least he hadn't mentioned it when I'd asked him at the beginning of the visit why he'd come to see me.

"Are you aware of all the ways cigarette smoking is bad for you?" I asked.

An alarmingly high proportion of patients know surprisingly little about all the potential consequences of tobacco smoking. Mr. Rodriguez, however, was able to come up with two of the major ones: heart attacks and lung cancer.

"Why do you keep smoking when you know it causes heart attacks and lung cancer?" I asked him. He shrugged, obviously embarrassed to be caught in a contradiction.

But even as I tried to shame him into wanting to quit by preying on his need to appear consistent, I knew no contradiction actually existed. I knew this not because of my medical training or subsequent years of medical practice, but rather because of my many years of practice as a Buddhist.

THE KEY INGREDIENT TO HAPPINESS

The kind of Buddhism I practice isn't Zen or Tibetan, the two most popular forms in the United States, but rather Nichiren Buddhism, named after its founder, Nichiren Daishonin. The practice of Nichiren Buddhism doesn't involve meditation as do the other more popular forms but rather something even more foreign and discomforting to those of us raised in the traditions of the West--chanting. Every morning and every night I chant the phrase nam-myoho-renge-kyo with a focused determination to challenge my negativity in an effort to give birth to wisdom. Wisdom, Nichiren Buddhism argues, is the key ingredient to achieving happiness.

And wisdom, rather than knowledge, is what my patient, Mr. Rodriguez, seemed so desperately lacking. He knew intellectually he shouldn't smoke, but that knowledge hadn't yet penetrated to become wisdom--to become, in essence, action. Despite his embarrassment, Mr. Rodriguez presented no contradiction because action never arises from knowledge alone. It arises from knowledge that is believed.

How often do we understand with our intellects how we ought to behave but find ourselves unable to do so? Why, for example, do some people know how to set appropriate boundaries with others, but other people can't bring themselves to say no to anyone? Why do some alcoholics figure out they need to stop drinking and stop, while others state they know they should, but never do? Why do some people hear advice to quit smoking and quit that very day, while others smoke on even after heart attacks and strokes?

The answer lies not just in what we believe but also in the degree to which we believe it. Deeply held belief--Buddhism (and psychology) would argue--introduces a critical ingredient necessary for change: motivation. One of my patients tried and failed to quit smoking for several years until his wife casually mentioned one day how much she hated coming home to a smoke-filled house, and he stopped for good the next day. He'd finally discovered the motivation to quit: a sudden, burgeoning awareness (that is, a deeply felt belief) of the harm his smoking was doing not to himself but to his wife. He was ultimately more capable of believing that his wife's life was at risk than he was his own. Not surprising when you consider most of us tend to deny the possibility of our own death far more vigorously than we deny the possibility of everyone else's.

HOW EFFECTIVE IS A DOCTOR'S ADVICE?

"How many of your patients actually quit because you tell them they should?" Mr. Rodriguez wanted to know after I told him my other patient's story.

In fact, one meta-analysis tells us on average only 2 out of every 100 smokers told by their physicians to quit will succeed in establishing long-term abstinence. It's less clear how many alcoholics or drug addicts who recognize they're addicted and need to quit actually do. But the principle remains the same: some people can digest intellectual knowledge and translate it into deep and motivating belief, belief they must change their behavior despite all the obstacles--and some simply can't.

Specifically, with regard to smokers, 98 out of every 100 can't. What, then, is the difference between those two smokers who hear their physicians' warnings about the dangers of smoking and for the first time truly understand it's time for them to quit and the other 98 who agree they should quit, who may even want to quit, but repeatedly fail in their attempts? Why did the possibility of losing his wife motivate one of my patients but not Mr. Rodriguez? Or asked from a Buddhist perspective, why do some find the wisdom and others do not?

One could argue that Mr. Rodriguez did in fact believe in the dangers of nicotine, both to himself and his wife, but that he was simply too addicted to succeed in quitting. I would argue, however, the problem lay less with the strength of his addiction and more with the weakness of his belief. If those dangers, which he only weakly believed applied to himself, could have in some way been brought home to him--as Ebeneezer Scrooge's impending death was brought home to him by the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come showing him his own tombstone--I'm convinced Mr. Rodriguez would have been able to resist the pleasure smoking provided and managed the pain of withdrawal abstention would have produced.

Nichiren Buddhism argues that the true reason for the emergence in the human mind of new and powerfully motivating belief is mystic--meaning, simply, unknowable--which is why I teach residents and students to ignore the odds and counsel all of their smoking patients to quit each and every time they see them. Despite our preconceived expectations that most of our patients won't be able to listen, clearly we have no way of predicting which 2 out of every 100 will.

HEALTH AND HAPPINESS

I would argue, therefore, there are two possible approaches to the practice of medicine and that the second of the two is better. The first involves diligently providing appropriate advice about smoking cessation, abstention from alcohol for those who abuse it, or pharmacological management of depression and anxiety (to name only a few of the common ailments that affect my patient population). The second approach, however, involves becoming interested in the beliefs patients hold that keep them trapped in harmful behavior patterns. It involves embracing a view of the human mind that recognizes all behavior arises out of belief and that if we could only help patients find their way to wisdom, their lives might then become governed by actions that lead to happiness and joy rather than pain and suffering.

This, then, is how I view the proper role of a physician: not just as an advocate for patients' health but for their happiness as well. While I certainly don't believe I have all the wisdom my patients would ever need to solve every problem they face, I am equally certain they do themselves. My ultimate aim, then, and, it turns out, the most enjoyable part of my day, involves encouraging patients to challenge their deeply held beliefs that, in my view, obstruct their ability to change maladaptive behaviors. Though I often fail, I am never able to predict with whom I will succeed, so I approach every patient as a mystery to be solved, always full of hope.

And as he left my office that morning no more determined to become a non-smoker than when he'd first entered, I wondered: what do you need to hear, Mr. Rodriguez? What experience will cause some critical piece of wisdom to penetrate into your heart and somehow motivate you to save your own life?

Please visit Dr. Lickerman's blog at http://happinessinthisworld.com to read other articles about achieving health and happiness.

Positive Thinking - Staying Up in Down Times

Positive thinking means looking for the good in every situation because there is always good, no matter how bad the event seems to be. Positive thinking is not acting like bad things don't happen.

People who smile when they feel sad, scared or down are not optimists. They disempower themselves in their deceit and pass the negative energy on to others.

People react to underlying feelings more than they do to spoken words. Like energies attract, so positive people attract positive people and positive events--and negative people attract negative people and negative events.

So what do you do when times are down in a sinking economy? Firstly, recognize you make choices about what you think and where you focus. If you spend time consuming media filled with doom and gloom, in actuality, you expand that negative energy for yourself and others.

Take note and you will see that the news is the same every day--only the names and faces change (from time to time). Also note that people who live in communities where no news media exist do not experience crime and its by-products.

I challenge you to refrain from reading, watching or listening to the news for one month. Notice the difference in your productivity. Track your moods and actions. You would be amazed at the number of super wealthy, super successful people who do not read, watch or listen to the news.

By the way, if something major happens in the world you will become aware of all the details that allow you to respond appropriately.

Your life goes where your energy flows. Stop the drain to negativity. Rather than focusing on incoming bad news, empower yourself by focusing on the world--your world--the way you want it to look. Act as though your world already looks that way.

Your world will change with your world view. Your positive outlook will energize you and bring new people and events into your life that support your new perspective. Warning: Your circle of friends will change. Those friends who choose to remain stuck will stay behind as you advance with the flow.

Millionaires grew out of the depression. In hard times 99% of people follow the herd mentality to the slaughter house. Are you in the 1% who step forward and take the risks that lead to glory?

If you don't like the way your world looks, change the way you look at your world.

Nothing can stop you when you choose to be someone who does things you've never done. Discover how to stay on track so you don't derail yourself in Ali Bierman's free ebook What You Don't Know You Don't Know. Grab your free copy now at http://creatingthelife.com/ebook.html

Monday, April 27, 2009

Talking Shop With a Yoga Master

I was born in Bombay to a family of lawyers.I started my yoga training with BKS Iyengar at age 7 and by age 22 I was the youngest student to earn an Advanced Teacher Training Certificate.As a child I was taught the teachings of Sri Aurobindo and the Mother of Pondicherry, both of whom are my spiritual teachers, along with my wife Mirra, who teaches Purna Yoga Meditation. I became a lawyer, certified naturopath, Ayurvedic practitioner, and a body worker.Mirra and I co-direct our studio, Yoga Centers, in Bellevue, WA, and I run a food company called Eastern Essence Organic Whole Foods.

I am often asked what it was like studying with Mr. Iyengar as a child.It was very intense. Iyengar is a very strict teacher-though not as strict now as he was then!Since I wasn't exactly born supple, I had to work really hard to get the movement he wanted. But he was more than just a teacher to me, he was also a friend. He would come over to our house, and we'd have breakfast and lunch and all that.Often he would stay at our house when he came to teach in Bombay many weekends. So we got to know the other side of him, which is one of the major reasons my family stayed with yoga.Had we only known him as the powerful teacher, we may not have continued, because his other side is very beautiful-gentle, sweet, childlike, full of fun, and loves adventure. Obviously my asana teaching is based on the Iyengar method.

I have a very firm belief that yoga is very vast. I cannot say this is my yoga and that is your yoga, because I believe that yoga is so big that we all have to share what we know.I believe that the blending of knowledge is very important without losing the essence of what you are teaching.I can't teach Ashtanga: I can't teach Viniyoga.But I can learn from them and see what is appropriate in my system.So that's what I do; I teach mostly physical yoga in the Iyengar method and the internal yoga is based on my wife Mirra's meditation teaching and Sri Aurobindo and the Mother's teachings.

A consistent question I get is how I find time for my own practice with such a busy schedule.There is just no option. Every morning I get up, do my basic rituals, and then go and practice.Practice is the first thing I do.If I miss the practice in the morning, I never practice!So it just goes without saying:I always do my practice first thing in the morning. People often ask me how my background in so many vocations affects my teaching.It really helps to have experience in different fields. Then, when you are teaching, you can tap into the different experiences and use language that resonates with different people.For example, one of my greatest loves is poetry-and I'm talking about classical, gorgeous, romantic poetry from Browning, Milton, Keats, Byron.

And when I quote these, it makes a huge difference in class. Similarly, if I use a legal term or an anatomical term, it resonates with certain people, and it makes the class richer. The best advice I can offer beginning yoga students is to find a teacher who truly knows the subject, which can be a tough thing because if you are a new student, you don't know if your teacher knows the subject.This is the main pitfall and the main joy of being a beginning student in yoga.It's a time to explore and find somebody who truly knows their job.And then stick with that teacher for a good five to ten years.And then, of course, yoga becomes one's life-long journey to internal revelation.

2008 Aadil Palkhivala

And now I invite you to claim your Free Instant Access to an excerpt of my new book, Fire of Love : Chapter 5: Feeling, from Fire of Love

To buy a copy- click on this link: Yoga Centers Online Store

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Self-Talk - What Style of Music Does Your Self-Talk Resemble?

My dad used to say that he always knew who was at home when he arrived. If he smelled something cooking he knew it was my sister, Debbie. If he heard piano music he knew it was me.

From the time that I was a baby, my dad sang to me. My mother, to the horror of family members, cashed in her teacher's superannuation (pension) of $300.00 when I was six to buy a piano so that I could take lessons. I remember taking my quarter each week and setting it on the corner of the instructor's piano to pay for the half hour session.

Over the years I have sung in choirs, purchased hundreds of 45s, LPs, 8-tracks (my age shows), cassettes and CDs. I have bought tickets to concerts, danced at Cabarets and sung in the Rotary Festival. As well, I have added some fun jazz songs when doing professional or impromptu entertaining.

Music has been and continues to be a powerful and influential part of my life.

Now I don't want to be disrespectful but I'm not big on "heavy metal". I don't know if it's the loudness or the lyrics but sometimes I would listen to songs with clients and feel the hair on the back of my neck rise or a tightening in my muscles. It's not that I hate it but it doesn't give me the same feeling as other types of music.

Our brains are similar, in some ways, to a ghetto blaster or stereo system. The major difference of course, is that the electronic system has a power button and can be turned off. Not so with the brain.

Sometimes I hear people state that they "veg" in front of the television and just let their brain go blank. That is really not possible. The brain is always working - even when we sleep.

The main similarity between the brain and the stereo system is that with each we choose the tunes we play. Self-talk involves the continuous stream of messages that we tell ourselves 24 hours a day. "I knew you wouldn't be able to do that" or "Way to go. You did it" can be as powerful to us as the reactions we have to "heavy metal" compared to "a lullaby".

When people are anxious, worried or insecure, the behaviours can often be observed in their body language. They might tremble, stutter or apologize frequently.

Affirmations are statements that a person makes to himself or herself. In order for them to be effective in helping the individual to reach potential, they need to state a goal in the present tense that is said with emotion. For example, if you are facing a test, it won't help to keep telling yourself "I can't do this. I'm going to fail". Instead you might reword your affirmation to "I can do this. I am smart enough and I have made it this far. I know that with preparation I am a person who can accomplish things that are important to me!"

What a difference! It's kind of like the difference between "heavy metal" and a "lullaby". They sound different and create different reactions and results.

What's your musical preference?

And now I would like to invite you to claim your Free Instant Access to a complimentary list of 10 Steps to Making Your Life an Adventure when you visit http://www.lindahancockspeaks.com

From Dr. Linda Hancock, Registered Psychologist and Registered Social Worker

Eye Of The Needle Christian Stor

Affirmations 101, FAQs - Why Do Some People Sabotage Their Affirmations?

Affirmations really work for a lot of people. I have heard countless stories, firsthand, of people manifesting income, lovers, children, lost items and events that are joyful beyond words. Others however, do a smash up job of sabotaging their affirmations efforts at every turn and end up with nothing they affirmed and usually being farther behind than when they started. Is it the fault of the affirmation? Are the gods out to get this person because of bad karma? Well, maybe but I doubt it. The answer is really much simpler than dirty karma or cheesed off affirmations elves - the answer is in the flow.

You see life has a flow and sometimes you are racing downstream with your goal clear in sight. Your fans are cheering you on from the shore - you can see your goal, you can smell it and sometimes even feel it between your fingertips. Other times you meander down a shallow creek sometimes running up on a dry creek bed or even getting caught in an overhanging tree. In the end the tree branch saves your life and you reach your goal. It's later than planned - but you get where you want just the same. Both of these events are part of life. Affirmers sometimes interpret these life events incorrectly and get themselves in a big muddle and end up tossing a super result down the 'life toilet'. Here is a great (and real) example:

Harry is focusing on manifesting a job that is closer to his creative gifting. He is a freelancer and for the last two years he has been doing projects that have been lucrative, but not exactly in line with his creative area. Harry has been aggressively affirming:

"I am now working with my creative talents and being paid handsomely for it".

So far it seems to make sense. As well as his job affirmation, Harry has been affirming to attract some new friends and live in a warmer climate. One day an old contact calls up Harry and asks him to work with him on a new product for a few months. Harry will be paid well, however, it is not in line with Harry's creative gifts. Harry is not busy with other projects but decides to not take the work because he wants to stay true to his affirmation:

"I am now working with my creative talents and being paid handsomely for it".

Harry continues to work his affirmation for the next two months. That old contact runs into Harry in a local coffee shop and mentions he still needs help with is product launch and lets Harry know he can still come on board. Harry, frustrated at his lack of progress with manifesting his job goal, again, says he is not interested. Later that week Harry tosses his affirmation in the garbage and angrily curses that darn blog that claimed 'affirmations really work'.

Whoops. Harry really blew it. Here is what was going on in the background while Harry was affirming and affirming for his creative talents to be used. Remember the client that called Harry and wanted help with that new product line? He was the bridge that would get Harry moved to a warmer climate within the next year. That new product line caught the eye of a wealthy angel investor that wanted the whole team to relocate to San Diego. That wealthy investor was to become Harry's best friend. Three years later Harry's best friend would invest in a creative idea that Harry dreamt about one warm San Diego night - That idea was the perfect match for Harry's creative talents.

Ouch. Well cheer up, Harry will never know any of this. Harry will continue on and think affirmations don't work and maybe reach his goal but it will be hard and it will probably take a long, long, long, long, time. Most likely Harry will spend a lot of time being discouraged, angry and unhappy.

Life is not a linear ruler that we can sit on and see from one side to the other. It twists, turns and wanders all about. Think about how you met your spouse, or a really good friend. Was it planned? Did you wake up one morning and say "Today I will meet a great person that I will spend the next 20 years with?" Likely not. Affirmations sometimes work the same way too. We affirm for a certain item to come to pass. We visualize. We meditate and we affirm some more. We are religious in our practice day in day out. Suddenly, one day, an opportunity presents itself for us to get involved in something, or we get invited to an event, or our car breaks down and a co-worker offers us a lift, or a neighbor offers to call us a plumber because our sink is plugged. We turn down the opportunity, we decline the invitation, we take a cab and we get out the plunger and start plunging. After all, these offers don't line up with our affirmations.

Or do they?

Accepting the flow in life in one of the best gifts you can give yourself and the key to seeing results from your affirmations. Remember flow means 'flow'. It takes no effort and it seems to appear from nowhere with you doing nothing to bring it to you. The next time you get an unexpected telephone call from someone you have not heard from in ten years, take notice. The next time you are offered something you were not expecting, think about it. And the next time you are affirming - be open to leaving the how's of your affirmation up to those affirmation elves*. I think they know what they are doing.

*Affirmation elves do not exist, I think.

Copyright (c) Joan Pasay 2009. All rights reserved. You may forward this article in its entirety (including author bio/links) to anyone you wish.

Joan Pasay is just one of the MoneyAffirmationsMP3.com Team, whose lives have been radically changed by the continued use of positive affirmations for money and in every area of life.

Want to enjoy more money? First change your money thoughts. Go to http://moneyaffirmationsmp3.com today.

Want to read Joan's affirmations blog? Go to http://affirmationsreallywork.com/blog right now.

You Can Have It All

Is it Time to Move Up?

I have helped many clients over the years with a real estate technique that's simply called "Moving Up". Although fairly self explanatory it can be very enlightening to look at the benefits of this simple strategy to reduce your taxes, lower your interest rate, increase the size of your home, lower your maintenance, increase your closet space, reduce the age of your home, and in some cases, all of the above combined with lower monthly payments or fewer years left on the mortgage. As houses age certain elements gradually become functionally obsolete such as bathrooms, closet space and kitchens. Newer construction is on the cutting edge of improvements to our living space and life can be a little more pleasant when our closets actually hold all of our stuff with room to spare.

We may also have more time and money for our other interests because we spend less time painting and keeping up with expensive maintenance. So let's take a look at some of the elements that are identifiable as green flags to consider moving up. First, how long you have been in your current house is a key factor. A general rule of thumb is that you need at least three to four years residency to justify a look at moving up. Five to Seven years is the most common range where we find that the benefits are most definitely noticeable. Ten years and above will in most every case produce benefits which will make it hard to decide to stay in your current home. A second, very important factor, are current interest rates. If current interest rates on new mortgages are lower than the rate you're paying now, this will increase the likelihood of the benefits of moving up. The third factor simply has to do with your feelings about your present house. Are you happy with your closet space or do you find that roominess is in short supply. We all have a tendency to grow our possessions. Are you glad you have a larger lot or do you sometimes find yourself wishing you didn't have to spend so much time with your lawn mower? Maybe you have a hill or two you would like to flatten out. Are you satisfied with your kitchen arrangement and the age of your appliances? Do the children have room to play inside on those rainy Saturdays? And the fourth consideration is your pocket book and or budget.

Over the ten years you've lived in your home you have likely increased your income while your fixed rate mortgage has frozen your principle and interest payment on your house. This has given you more disposable income. You may ask yourself "where in the world has that money gone? Do you like where it's going or would it be wiser to put at least some if not all of it into a newer or larger home in a better location. It may also be worthwhile for us to look at the financial side of this equation. Let's assume you currently have an 8.5% interest rate and that you've lived in the same 20-year-old house for 10 years. We'll also assume that the remaining balance on your mortgage is $55,000 and that your 1650 square foot house has a current market value of $100,000. After all selling expenses your net from the sell of your current house will be approximately $38,500. If you purchase a $150,000 home and use the $38,500 as a down payment, your new mortgage will be $111,500 and at 5.75% the new principle and interest payment will only be $186 a month more than your old payment. One drawback to consider is that your old mortgage had 20 remaining years while the new mortgage with the lowest payment will reset you back to 30 years. The younger you are the less this will impact your estate. If you are older you may want to consider keeping your term at 20 years and in this case the payment would be $318 difference per month. Now it's simply a matter of considering if the difference is worth the benefits. The new home will likely be some 400 square feet bigger and will likely be half the age of the old house. It may very well be in a better location with a greater land value than the old house. It's also interesting that although your new interest rate is 2 percent lower, you now have a tax deduction that is $2000 greater!

One more drawback...you can't take good neighbors with you...but you can invite them to your New House Warming party and pick up some great gifts! Here are the logical steps in the process:

Contact a member of the National Association of Realtors for more information about "moving up."

Ask your Realtor to provide you with an in depth market analysis (CMA or BPO) on you current residence.

Ask your Realtor to perform a "mock sale" on your current residence to show you the net proceeds after the expenses of the sale.

Ask your Realtor to calculate the contract price of your new home using the net from the sale as your down payment and closing cost and the amount you are willing to budget for the new monthly payment.

Ask your Realtor to provide you with a list of homes currently available in the calculated price range.

Ask your Realtor to arrange for you to visit several houses on the list. How do they feel compared to your present house?

Is the difference in payment worth that feeling? You may be pleasantly surprised!

Don Anderson is a real estate broker in Knoxville, TN. He can be contacted at 865-588-3232 or http://www.knoxvillehouses.com

You may also be interested in watching a video on this subject. click here: http://www.knoxvillehouses.com/index.cfm/Equity-Treasure-4539.html

Christianity Saved My Life

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Numerology's Love Relationship - What Kind Of Partner You Need

Want to know what kind of love relationship you need? Numerology can tell you what kind of partner you need to find happiness in life. We just need to calculate your Love Relationship number.

Calculating your Love Relationship Number

Your Love Relationship number comes from a specific branch of Numerology called Yantra or Magic Square numerology. It consist of constructing a Magic square using your birth date numbers, and then interpreting the values in the specific boxes in the square.

Your Love Relationship number is found by taking your birth month number, subtracting (1), then reducing the result by fadic addition.

For example, actor Johnny Depp was born on June 9th, 1963; so his Love relationship number would be calculated as follows:

Love Relationship number = (Birth Month - 1) = (6 - 1) = (5)

The Love Relationship number values and their meanings are listed below.

Love Relationship (0)

You don't have any particular needs or wants in a relationship. You like them well enough, but you don't have any need for a special type of partner. You are happy with whatever comes to you.

Love Relationship (1)

You will have one major love relationship which grows and develops over time. You may tend to be self-centered in your relationships; however you can probably find a partner who loves you in spite of this.

Love Relationship (2)

You are a very supportive partner. You communicate well with your lover, due to your strong intuition in this area. You are also able to detect when your partner is worried, or something is wrong in your relationship.

Love Relationship (3)

You need a partner who likes conversation and plenty of entertainment. You are a bit of a flirt at times, but your partner needn't worry; this is mostly for show and not a serious threat to your relationship.

Love Relationship (4)

You are an affectionate partner. You work hard at your relationships, and care deeply for the ones you love. You are always faithful, and a good provider for your love partners; but not particularly passionate. You need a partner who appreciates you for who you are.

Love Relationship (5)

You need a partner who gives you lots of personal space. You are an excellent partner and a passionate lover so long as you don't feel trapped and bound by your relationship. If your partner tries to cage you, hold you too tightly; you're likely to break up so you can escape.

Love Relationship (6)

You need a partner who gives you a good, strong relationship; full of love and affection. You feel incomplete outside of a relationship, and will seek to create a new one if your previous one fails. You are very caring and need friends and loved ones around you to accept your love. If you don't have children, then you must find a substitute to receive your affection.

Love Relationship (7)

You need a partner who gives you time to be alone with your thoughts. You are a thoughtful lover, always thinking of your partner and acting to show your affection. However, you have trouble expressing your love in words, either written or spoken. Love literally puts binders on your tong.

Love Relationship (8)

You need a partner who helps you do well financially in order to be happy. You might form a successful business with your partner, or marry into wealth. Your relationships might not be as passionate as some, but they tend to be long lasting, and give you happiness.

Love Relationship (9)

You are inclined to fall in love easily, sometimes with the wrong partners. You are very romantic and a considerate lover. You like surprising your partner with small gifts as token of your affection. You need to be careful in choosing a partner, and not rush in to a relationship. With the right partner, your relationship will grow very strong indeed.

Love Relationship (11)

You need a strong and supportive partner in order to be happy. You will fall in and out of love very easily and may be disappointed trying to find the perfect relationship. You are able to express your love easily, and you're a caring partner, but you are too much of an idealist for your own good.

Keith Abbott is the developer and owner of 'Numerology 4 You' where you can order your own Numerology reading, including your personal Lucky Numbers. Visit him on the web today at http://www.numerology4you.com

Difficulties Talking About Religion

How to Stay Up When the Economy is Down - 5 Tips to Get You Started

How can I be happy when my home is losing its value, my 401k is going down, and the price of everything else is going up?

It's a question I hear a lot lately. It seems that as the financial picture becomes more depressed, so do we. That's why now, more than ever, we need to learn to be happy from the inside out-no matter what's going on in our lives.

The good news is that it's possible. Doing the research for my book, Happy for No Reason: 7 Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out, I interviewed scores of scientists, as well as one hundred unconditionally happy people, and discovered that there's a state of inner peace and well-being that's isn't dependent on external circumstances. I call this being Happy for No Reason.

When you're Happy for No Reason, you don't need to manipulate the world around you to make yourself happy; you bring happiness to your everyday experiences rather than trying to extract happiness from them.

An added benefit of this state is that the happier you are, the more successful you become! Happy people naturally have greater opportunities, better health, deeper friendships, more customers and so on-plus they make more money. Research shows that people who are happy earn over $750,000 more in their lifetime than others.

So how can you be Happy for No Reason?

Science is showing the way. Researchers in the field of positive psychology have found that we each have a "happiness set-point," that determines our level of happiness. No matter what happens, whether it's something as exhilarating as winning the lottery or as challenging as a horrible accident, most people eventually return to their original happiness level. Like your weight set-point, which keeps the scale hovering around the same number, your happiness set-point will remain the same unless you make a concerted effort to change it. In the same way you'd crank up the thermostat to get comfortable on a chilly day, you actually have the power to reprogram your happiness set-point to a higher level of peace and well-being. The secret lies in practicing the habits of happiness.

In the course of my research, I uncovered 21 core happiness habits that anyone can use to become happier and stay that way. Here are a few tips to get you started:

1. Incline Your Mind Toward Joy. Have you noticed that your mind tends to register the negative events in your life more than the positive? If you get ten compliments in a day and one criticism, what do you remember? For most people, it's the criticism. Scientists call this our "negativity bias"--our primitive survival wiring that causes us to pay more attention to the negative than the positive. To reverse this bias, get into the daily habit of consciously registering the positive around you: the sun on your skin, the taste of a favorite food, a smile or kind word from a co-worker or friend. Once you notice something positive, take a moment to savor it deeply and feel it; make it more than just a mental observation. Spend 20 seconds soaking up the happiness you feel.

2. Let Love Lead. One way to power up your heart's flow is by sending lovingkindness to your friends and family, as well as strangers you pass on the street. Next time you're waiting for the elevator at work, stuck in a line at the store or caught up in traffic, send a silent wish to the people you see for their happiness, well-being, and health. Simply wishing others well switches on the "pump" in your own heart that generates love and creates a strong current of happiness.

3. Lighten Your Load. To make a habit of letting go of worries and negative thoughts, start by letting go on the physical level. Cultural anthropologist Angeles Arrien recommends giving or throwing away 27 items a day for nine days. This deceptively simple practice will help you break attachments that no longer serve you.

4. Make Your Cells Happy. Your brain contains a veritable pharmacopeia of natural happiness-enhancing neurochemicals-endorphins, serotonin, oxytocin, and dopamine-just waiting to be released to every organ and cell in your body. The way that you eat, move, rest, and even your facial expression can shift the balance of your body's feel-good-chemicals, or "Joy Juice," in your favor. To dispense some extra Joy Juice-smile. Scientists have discovered that smiling decreases stress hormones and boosts happiness chemicals, which increase the body's T-cells, reduce pain, and enhance relaxation. You may not feel like it, but smiling-even artificially to begin with-starts the ball rolling and will turn into a real smile in short order.

5. Hang with the Happy. We catch the emotions of those around us just like we catch their colds-it's called emotional contagion. So it's important to make wise choices about the company you keep. Create appropriate boundaries with emotional bullies and "happiness vampires" who suck the life out of you. Develop your happiness "dream team"-a mastermind or support group you meet with regularly to keep you steady on the path of raising your happiness.

"Happily ever after" isn't just for fairytales or for only the lucky few. Imagine experiencing inner peace and well being as the backdrop for everything else in your life. When you're Happy for No Reason, it's not that your life always looks perfect-it's that however it looks, you'll still be happy!

Marci Shimoff is the woman's face of the biggest self-help book phenomenon in history, Chicken Soup for the Soul with six bestselling titles selling more than 13 million copies worldwide in 33 languages. Her upcoming book, Happy for No Reason, is being published by Simon and Schuster in December 2007. To receive a free audio on love, happiness, and the Law of Attraction, visit: http://www.HappyForNoReason.com

Understanding Love and Why That Will Make You Happy

We can not hear love, nor can we see it. Certainly we know when we have it however, as we long for the person who we share this emotion with. We miss them, we want to protect them and we want to spend time with them.

Isn't it interesting that out of all the billions of people on this earth that we only find a few who we are capable of feeling this connection with. In fact some people seem to bring out a quite opposite feeling in us.

Yet we do have the capacity to love not only other humans, but animals as well. Certainly if you have ever had a special pet, you are aware that the feeling was reciprocated as well.

What is love though? We know when love is present there is a special feeling that we can feel quite strongly. When we are "in love" the feeling is very much overwhelming. Love is more than the feeling that we feel though, it is also a connection between two similar things. It is a state of mind where one is eager to allow the actions of another. It is a state of mind where one wants to share freely with another. Love is a binding force between two things that compels them to come together in complete allowing of differences.

Why does this magical spell only exist between certain combinations of people? Why do some people seem completely detached from this emotion in general? And why do some people seem to flow with love for anyone they meet?

Here we go, the answer is... JUDGMENT! Pretty simple aye? The thing about love is that love is the natural state of our being human. It is the normal setting of being a human. If we did not interfere with our natural state of being, then love would be what we would have. Love exists when we do nothing. Love is pushed aside anytime we use judgment, be that judgment of another person or of self.

Love does not exclude anything for reasons of judgment. Of all the people you know in your life that you can honestly say you have no feelings of love for them, then you know you have judged these people for any number of reasons. When you judge someone or something you have separated yourself from that person, you have divided yourself from that person, you have cut yourself off from the natural normal connection that is always present. If your judgment was not in the way, then there would be only love. Love is always present, always there. Love exists no matter what. It only seems elusive when we build walls of judgment towards others.

If you want your life to be more loving then all you have to do is stop judging others. This action would immediately remove the walls between you and everyone else allowing you to experience the flow of love that is always flowing. You do not have to do anything to have a lifetime full of love. You only have to allow it to be. Love will not condemn another as some would. Love would not think hateful thoughts of another. Love allows, and allows unconditionally.

It is one thing to make an observation of someone and notice that perhaps their lifestyle is not something that makes you feel as if you want to be around this person. You can honor this feeling toward yourself and at the same time still not judge this person for who they are or how they live their own life.

Love is about understanding that we are all the same, living in unique situations in a billion different circumstances. We can notice that some others may be doing harmful actions to themselves or others. We can hold these people responsible for their actions. We can certainly set boundaries of how we wish to be treated. We can even get annoyed by a person with a specific personality. As long as we use observations, and do not cross over to judgment, then we can still leave the current of love open to flow through us.

Judgment feels bad, you know that you are exercising judgment when you think of someone in a way that makes you feel bad inside. You have projected that bad feeling upon the person you are thinking about, yet the feeling is within you! This is when you have let an observation cross over to judgment. This is when you have unplugged yourself from the natural current of love that flows 100 percent, all the time.

The thing about love is that when we allow ourselves to be connected to this current as much as humanly possible, we are not just feeling better about life, but we are also in harmony with life, with the universe, with God if you will. When remaining in this state of mind, we create tremendous experiences in our lives that seem to come from everywhere. It is as if we are tuned into the power of prosperity directly.

Living in this current of love means that we have allowed the universe to be as it is. We have not separated ourselves from parts of the universe by judging it as we see it in others. This conscious allowing of the universe as it is, allows the universe to provide more and more to you, since you have not closed yourself in behind any self created walls.

Begin to notice your thoughts of others. Begin to notice if you prefer to notice negative things and then think about those things; or notice if you will overlook some distasteful things to find qualities that you can admire, and then think of those things. Spend a day hooking up to that current of love and see how fast it can sweep you away!

Tony Hanes - Author, Inventor, Metaphysical Teacher
http://trimmerassist.net/the_meaning_of_life_is

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Creating Boundaries or Barriers - Where Do You Hang Out?

What I've seen as a professional coach is that much of our personal power ('claiming our life as our own') relies on setting clear boundaries -- listening to our own values, asking for help, and knowing what we want and don't want. There's an art to setting boundaries that do not become barriers to love and closeness.

What's the distinction between a boundary and a barrier? It lies in our intention which then influences how we behave. When we believe we need to defend or protect ourselves by setting a boundary, we are likely acting out of fear which in turn can keep others at a distance.

Possible reasons behind setting up barriers (fear-based actions):

  • When we think we're setting boundaries, we may actually be5B4 behaving defensively -- not wanting to own a part of ourselves that we judge as not okay.
  • When we decide to change our ways and set clear boundaries, we may express ourselves with the power of pent-up emotions collected during those times we felt like doormats. Our impact can be likened to a sledgehammer hitting a mosquito.
  • Fighting may be the only way we know to take a stand.
  • Believing that we have to fight for what we want or for our rights, and acting accordingly, can be a defensive block to intimacy that works.
  • We may be afraid to be close and truly love another because we have a belief we will lose ourselves in a relationship...again. So we inadvertently push people away.

How might we do that?? Even though our words to the person may be carefully chosen in order to not be accusatory, the energy or tone which accompanies them can be a different story. We may sound angry, blameful and intense, and others may react defensively or want to withdraw or retaliate. A barrier to feeling connected occurs. In other words, what we think are boundaries may actually be a chain-linked fence that keeps others out.

What's another way? When boundaries are set from a place of love and trust, we calmly express what needs to be expressed...for us. There is no blame, anger, or need to control another. "This is what I need" comes from a place of being in touch with ourse5B4lves. We go inward and then state what we want to say clearly and simply. We check in with ourselves and do or say what feels right for us without a need to defend or justify what we say or do. Nor do we have the need to control someone else's reaction.

The foundational beliefs that someone has who sets clear boundaries are: I am worthy. I respect myself. It's okay for me to address what I need. I know I have a choice about what I do, say, or think. I follow what feels right inside of me. Instead of a chain-linked fence, this is like having an invisible fence collar; a boundary that is simply respected by ourselves and others.

For example, a woman was challenged by her partner about her environmental consciousness. Instead of reacting defensively like, "I'm doing the best that I can. This is me. I get to behave in a way that feels right for ", she can choose to hear what her partner says as a value of his and, if she's willing, reflect on her own value regarding environmentalism. Then she can follow through on what feels right for her.

Another woman who was caring for her elderly mother reached the point of feeling burnt out. She could angrily let her two siblings know that they weren't there for her and that she would no longer give more than one third of her share....and create a barrier. Other options are that she either ask for help or share that she needs to step back right now, trusting that her siblings will do 5B4what feels right for them in addressing their mother's needs.

A parent could scream and demand that her children participate in the household chores from a critical place which could create a barrier. A boundary that honors her needs would be setting up a chart with clear consequences for following or not following through with the chores so each child could choose how they will behave.

How do we overcome that fear of closeness and losing ourselves? How do we stay self- connected so that we move toward what we truly want -- harmony and intimacy - instead of pushing others away?

It's a process. Day by day, it means checking in with our core. When we are truly at home with whom we are and connected to our core, we trust ourselves to be truly intimate with another. We know that we can't lose ourselves because we listen to ourselves. We understand that we don't have to fight to get what we want or work hard to control someone else. We get that it's an inside job and that it's all about us. We have choice. The respect that we give ourselves is reflected back to us.

You might not see the connection between being afraid to love and setting healthy boundaries. What I've seen is that when we have inner confidence, we communicate with others, particularly our intimate partner, from a foundation of feeling worthy, self-connected and whole. We behave lovingly to others because we love ourselves. The possibility of creating i59Dntimacy in our relationships then increases many fold.

I'd love to hear what you notice is different for you as you raise your awareness about setting clear boundaries. And please pass this article onto others on this path.

Jeannie Campanelli leads groups and works one-on-one with an international clientele. She has been interviewed by national magazines including Homemaker's, has been published in Esteem Magazine, and is a contributing author of "101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life" along with such luminaries as Byron Katie, Mark Victor Hansen, and Ken Blanchard. To find out more about Jeannie and learn how to more fully develop your inner confidence, please visit her websites, http://www.innerconfidencecoaching.com and http://www.coachingcircles.ca

Believing In Religion Do You Feel Inforned - Movie Video

Are you one of those who believed in your religion wholeheartedly and never has doubted it. Watch this video to gather some more information about questioning your religion.

Spiritual Christian and Create a Wonderful Life For Yourself And Your Family. Greg Vanden Berge is one of the best inspirations on the planet. You will be hearing a lot about this guy in the future. You can count on it.

Power Of Positive Thinking
Create Your Day

The Power of Persistence - Doing Whatever it Takes

"The majority of people are ready to throw their aims and purposes overboard and give up at the first signs of opposition or misfortune. A few carry on despite all opposition until they attain their goal. Weak desires produce weak results."
Napoleon Hill
Author: Think and Grow Rich

At some time or another, all of us will have our resolve tested to keep going or quit. The moment of reckoning comes when your persistence and commitment to the cause are met with equal or even greater opposition.

Persistence means to go stubbornly on or resolutely, in spite of difficulties.

Almost without exception, most high achievements are the result of persistence. If showing up and waiting for success is all it took, we would all be experiencing the sweet taste of victory. We know that's not true.

The biographies of great individuals show a common theme: how those individuals overcame adversity to realize victory and success. Think about some outstanding stories and the men and women who lived them. Now remove the hardships from their stories. How do you feel about those individuals now? Not as impressed or perhaps not even interested?

As a society, the stronger the adversity a person has seen, the higher our acknowledgment and respect for that individual. We say Wow and get encouraged, motivated, and inspired by his or her tale of persistence.

It seems there is some correlation between the level of persistence, the price paid, and the achievement. For example, Nelson Mandela spent decades in a South African prison but kept his dream of freedom alive. Walt Disney went bankrupt more than once. The best-selling Chicken Soup books were thought to be a losing idea; they were rejected by publishers more than 26 times!

So where is your persistence being tested?

I grew up on a dairy farm and later operated my own herd. In this type of operation, persistence is commonplace. During a record-cold February morning, I arrived in the barn at my usual 5:30 am to find everything frozen solid. Until pipes were thawed, no milking could be done. If you know a bit about dairy cattle, milking twice a day is not an option; it's a necessity. I did not have time to wait till evening or the next day or until things thawed. The situation had to be dealt with then and now.

I had no hot water to thaw out the pipes. None of the vehicles would start, either.

What to do?

I walked to the neighbors' farm and carried two five-gallon buckets of hot water the few hundred yards back home. Several trips, complete exhaustion, and two hours latersuccess. Now I could start my three hours of morning chores. It was never a question of if, only when.

Life is constantly presenting us with obstacles and challenges to test whether we are serious about our legitimate goals, desires, dreams, or objectives. Ask anyone who has realized a significant level of success in any field and you will almost always hear a story of persistence in spite of circumstances.

For those in sales, research bears this out. On average it takes 4 to 7 contacts to make a sale. Quit after three visits and you miss over 80% of the opportunities. That's why 20% of sales representatives earn 80% of the revenue-they are the ones willing to make calls 4, 5, 6 and 7.

This applies to everything in our life: health, relationships, investments, business ventures, and so on.

We are all familiar with the quote: "Quitters never win and winners never quit." The question is . . . where do you feel you lie on the persistence continuum? Not-at-all persistent? Fully and 100% persistent?

Apply your answer to all areas of you life. The energy you need to be persistent can come from the strategies listed in the Action Steps that follow but, in essence, your level of persistence will be equal to or less than your level of desire to achieve your objective. If you have little desire to be successful and you are not successfulwhatever you define as successwhy be surprised?

Think about new-born children and their learning-to-walk stage. After the first few falls, do we say, "It looks like this walking thing is not working so maybe you should crawl for the rest of your life." We would never accept that attitude from children, but every day we accept it from ourselves or others. Failure such as falling down while learning to walk is part of the human condition, but we have the power to decide whether we stay down or get back up and try again.

Persistence is a choice. At every given moment, we can either give in to the challenges or figure out a way to overcome them.

I encourage each of you to embrace the quality and character of persistence and help others do the same.

Building Persistence Action Steps

1. Determine your level of persistence on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being 100% persistent) in the following areas of your life.
a. Health and Wellness
b. Investments and Wealth Management
c. Job/Career Achievement
d. Realizing Fulfilled Relationships
e. Business Opportunities
f. Other
2. Based on your responses to question 1, what level of persistence do you have in each area of your life? What in your makeup and background has caused you to respond at those levels? Are you happy with your responses?
3. Persistence is fueled by being on purpose and having a burning desire to accomplish something. Is this true for each primary area of your life? If not, why not?
4. To be persistent, focus most on the outcome or final objective. This will encourage you to move forward and not be deterred by the current circumstances.
5. Seek encouragement-in person, on the phone, or from a book or tape-from others who have demonstrated the character of persistence.
6. Seek the additional knowledge required to realize your goals or objectives.
7. Understand that being foolish and ignorant in the quest of a goal is different than being persistent.
8. To build up your persistence habit, start with the minor and move to the major.
9. Avoid shortcuts, ignore negative people, and do not fear criticism.
10. When you fail-and you will, regroup, revisit, and revise your approach. Never, never quit when you are on purpose.
11. In the end you are responsible for your choices. After all, you will have to live with them for the rest of your life.

Until next time, keep "Living on Purpose."

Ken Keis

For information on CRG Resources, please visit http://www.crgleader.com

Called one of the most passionate and on purpose presenters that you will ever experience. Ken's intense and engaging style will get and keep you thinking. He has shared the stage with some of the top speakers in the world including Mark Victor Hansen, Robert Allen, and Kenneth Blanchard.

Over the past 17 years he has conducted over 2000 presentations and published over 200 articles and designed over 40 business management, leadership, relationship or sales processes. As past host of a regular personal and business success audio magazine, Ken has had the privileged of interviewing the best professional and business development specialists from around the world.

He loves business, while inspiring and educating others on how to discover their purpose. He will help you realize and achieve your full potential no matter what you choose to do in your life.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

3 Proven Steps How to Set Your Goal

Do you have anything you want to achieve in your life? I believe that everyone has his or her own dreams that they like to achieve in their life. Unfortunately, most people fail to get what they want simply because they are not determined and committed in it. And this is how goal setting can help you. You will discover the 3 proven steps how to set your goal and achieve anything you want in your life.

Many people thought that the process of goal setting is complicated, but it is not. It is easy and it can be fun as you are designing your own destiny. Here are the 3 proven steps that will help you...

1. Before you can even set your goal, you must first find out what goal you really want to achieve in your life. What do you want in the next 5 to 10 years? This is the first and the most fundamental step of how to set your goal that you must first take. If you don't have a clear destination of where you are heading, you will never reach the place where you want to go. First determine your target, know what you want in your life.

2. Next, take out a piece of paper and write down your goals on this paper. You must be as specific as possible in this and include a deadline for your goal. Do not underestimate this step as doing so will make your goal more tangible and hence it will activate your law of attraction. The key in doing so is so that you will keep reminding yourself about what you want to achieve therefore you will tend to move toward that direction.

3. The final step of how to set your goal is to actually make your goal come true. You must take action in order to produce the results you want. If you are just sitting right there, nothing will ever happen. It takes action to produce results. And the lack of action is the number one killer of all successes. Don't just talk and dream about what you want, put them into action and make the come true.

These are the 3 proven steps how to set your goal. It is not complicated but it is not easy as well. This is because it requires hard work and consistent action to make your goal come true. As long as you stick with these 3 proven steps here, you will definitely achieve what you want in your life.

Looking for proven steps how to set your goal? Do you want to achieve your goals in a faster way? Discover the real proven strategies for goal setting with my Goal Setting Strategies. You will discover how you can achieve anything you want in your life by using simple, proven and effective strategies with goal setting.

Get instant Access to my PROVEN SUCCESS STRATEGIES today by visiting http://www.Goal-Setting-Activities.com/ now.

Fear is a Warning, Not a Reason to Shut Down a Goal

Fear has a purpose -- it should not be ignored, but definitely faced head on.

Whether the fear is physical, emotional or social, it can have beneficial value to protect us from possible harm. In this respect fear can serve us well. The down side is when we allow fear to consume us or shut down constructive action.

When fear surfaces while pursuing a goal it can be discouraging. It disrupts the momentum and requires some re-booting. Practically every goal worth achieving eventually faces obstacles. One of those challenges can often be the feeling of fear, a sense of danger or apprehension. Perhaps it is brought about by a lack of confidence, a realization that the task is bigger than anticipated, or simply a bump in the road.

Fear should be addressed head on. Determine its origin, whether it is a valid concern, and how you will resolve the issue. This holds true for all fear. It is important that what is causing the feeling of fear be understood and handled with an appropriate solution. Unfortunately, way too often we allow fear, founded or unfounded, to undermine our thinking and deter positive action.

If you are committed to a goal and a sense of fear is nagging at you, deal with it so you can get on with your mission. Remember that you determine your state of mind and the choices you make. Confirm the value of your goal and what you are willing to overcome to achieve it. Consciously decide to focus on the desired end result you want and the steps required to reach it.

Above all, take control and face the fear at hand. Do not let fear overtake your commitment to achieve a goal. You may need to adjust the route you take or re-think the reasons for the goal. But, fear itself is not a mandate to shut down a goal that you have thoroughly considered and believe in.

David Schaefer is a success coach and writes on the topics of personal development and Internet marketing. For more articles visit http://DiscoverMillionDollarDesire.com/blog -- For online entrepreneurs visit: http://InfiniteIncomePlanRevealed.com

Believing In Religion Video

I was reading a book on advertising when the author mentioned, "All Advertising Is about Hope."

Check out one of his recommended books, Read This Book

Greg is currently creating articles on religion filled with great subjects on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world. His views on religious freedom are slowly changing the way people think about institutional religion.

Grief Recovery Handbook
Crisis In Christianity

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Spreading the Good Word of God Gently

The other day I was walking through the park when I saw a man, an extremely large man reading the Bible. I was minding my own business like I normally do in full observation mode, just simply enjoying life. When what I thought was a tree reading the Bible, moved and scared the crap out of me. This man was about 6'9" and look like he played professional football but when he spoke it was nonthreatening and very gentle.

Have you read the Bible he said. I thought to myself, you have got to be kidding me. Couldn't this person have been smaller and what's he going to do when I tell him that I have but no longer follow Christianity. I liked my face and the rest of my body, should I lie to this man to save my own life or would he be understanding about my beliefs.

I threw the dice out on the table and told him that I have read the Bible and do not believe it is the word of God, the Creator of the universe. I explained to him that, there is a lot of useful information and some wonderful stories in the Bible but that it could not completely be proven as factual information. I continued to explain to him that there was a lot of information in the Bible that contradicted itself and some that simply wasn't true.

He sat back down on the park bench and asked me to join him. I couldn't resist as I always have enjoyed talking about religion and ready to learn something about this man and why he is a Christian. He started to tell me about some recent events that have happened in his life, some bad, some worse and of course some that he didn't want to talk about. However, he did mention a trip to church a few Sundays ago that changed his life.

I was happy for him that he had found peace but explained to him that he is extremely vulnerable to anything right now that can make a little sense out of his life. Be careful I told him, because you could get caught up in something that feels and sounds good, only to find out later in life, that you have questions about Christianity that can't be answered.

I had a very pleasant conversation with this person and I believe he appreciated a few of the points I made. When people are down and out and their lives seem to be really messed up, they're extremely vulnerable to others religious beliefs, whether they're right or wrong.

Don't force your religious beliefs onto others, be kind and courteous to those who are on the edge and having difficulties in life. Explaining to them about your religion and how it has benefited you is wonderful but it might not be as beneficial to someone else. The next time you plan on converting someone who is down in the dumps, make sure that you understand your own religion before you pass false beliefs onto others.

It's like a cancer spreading through the body, most of the cancer cells don't know what they are doing or how much damage is going to be done until it's too late.

You are free to copy this article to your site as long as you include the following resource information with an active link to my site:

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development. Check out one of his recommended books, You Can Have It All

Greg is currently working on a self help library filled with great subjects on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world. His views on religious freedom are slowly changing the way people think about institutional religion.

Council Of Nicaea Conclusion

The Beginning of Religions

It seems like everywhere we look in the world, we are always focused on something in the middle. Often we are spending most of our time thinking about the end and never thinking about how it all began. In the holy Bible, it states in the beginning but doesn't talk about the beginning of the beginning. Where did God come from, that is the actual beginning.

I don't know how many stories I've read in the Bible about other people's triumphs and defeats, but keep in mind that some of these stories cannot be proven, factually. Some people believe in Krishna, others Jesus, Buddha, God, and the vast and numerous creators of the world and the entire universe. I don't know which one or if all of them are the true God's and by that I would refer to God as the creator of the universe.

It seems to be extremely difficult to prove scientifically and without any doubt, that the earth was created by a creator, according to popular religious text and would be very difficult to prove with in the leading religions of the world.

Let's get back to the question of where did God come from? There obviously had to be someone before the creation of the universe, if you choose to believe in a creator. Is God a man, woman or some sort of spiritual entity, like a ghost or maybe some smoke that can form into anything at any time and if so, did his secrets come from another creator or superior being. Was God involved in self-help and learned all these secrets on his own, through trial and error.

I often wonder, how long the creator of the universe was alive before our creation and what other worlds has this all mighty and powerful being built before or after ours. Do we have sister universes and if so, will we ever be able to see them or visit them, during our lifetimes.

Most people dismiss the creation of the creator, but wouldn't this be one of the most important parts of any religion? There's obviously something to think about here and I wish that most people practicing religions, which involve a deity or superior being, could take a little more interest in finding out where their God actually came from.

Oh yeah, one more thing. If you do find the answers, I would love to hear from you and by the way, you would be solving one of the universes most perplexing and complicated secrets. You could be a gazillionaire and make the cover of Time magazine, something to think about.

Religious Education

You are free to copy this article to your site as long as you include the following resource information with an active link to my site:

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development.

Greg is currently working on a Christian help library filled with great subjects on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world. His views on religious freedom are slowly changing the way people think about institutional religion.

Five Things You Should Know

Is the Bible Accurate

I'm going to start with the first book of the holy Bible, Genesis chapter 1 verse one through five. In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void and darkness was over the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters.

And God said," let there be light," and there was light. And God saw that the light was good. And God separated the light from the darkness. God called the light day, and the darkness he called night. And there was evening and there was morning, the first day.

If the Bible is historically accurate, did God actually create earth. I have been battling over this, my whole life. It's very easy for someone to accept and believe in any religion, government, other people or whatever they truly desire to make real. I see it every day of my life, open your eyes and you will see it to.

It's hard to imagine that a superior entity like God created everything that we touch and see. The moon itself is pretty big and the creation of the sun would prove to be a little more difficult, but if you're God and your all knowing and all powerful, he or she or it, must be one incredible being.

This is only the first couple of paragraphs in the Bible and there is no, I repeat no, historical accuracy to this event. It seems like God or man, whoever wrote the Bible, should have started the Bible with something a little more believable for people that live in the 21st century. It's not hard to imagine someone 2000 years ago, believing in something like this.

2000 years ago the Romans were worshiping their own gods, we might find this ridiculous today but back then the Romans would punish you if you didn't worship their gods. We are not too far from that today. If we don't stop organized religion and their influence on humanity, we're going to have serious problems in the future.

The biggest problem I foresee is common sense. If the Bible has 500 historical accurate facts that can be proven without a doubt by historians, scholars and other intelligent people, but has one thing that can't be explained, how do we handle this. How do we handle the fact that the Bible states God created light? If this is false, what else is false in the Bible.

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development. Have you ever really ask yourself Who is, Jesus of Nazareth?

Greg is currently working on a Personal Power Ideas. If you're ever wondering why some people can achieve success, while others seem to struggle aimlessly, what would it hurt, to take a couple of minutes of your time, if you could actually find the truth.

Christianity As the World Changes

Most people seem to go through life doing what others do and never seem to question much about whether the people around them are actually right or wrong. How many of us do exactly what our parents, grandparents and great grandparents do? I was raised a Christian by Christians and they were raised Christians by other Christians and so on. I don't know when or who in my family tree actually decided to become part of the Christian faith. I don't think it really matters today.

Someone had to of made the decision and I will probably never know. I do know this, I have followed Christianity as far as I possibly could and the next step in my life is going to be based somehow on a more spiritually universal world. I can't seem to follow something, that doesn't make sense to me, anymore. Christianity is more or less a religion that people throughout history have made adjustments to, whenever they felt necessary.

This is often like changing a tire on a car as it starts to wear or goes flat. In order for the car to operate and run smoothly we will need to pay a little attention to it, this will require maintenance over time as the car begins to have problems. We have to solve these problems or our car will become useless and will need to be sent to the junkyard.

Religions throughout history have done the same, as the people become more intelligent and less dependent, they need to create new things and make adjustments. If they don't make these adjustments over time, the religion will no longer be necessary and be sent to the junk heap of time. This is what happened to the Greek and Roman gods, what makes you think, that your God or gods will stand the test of time.

Do you think there's going to be any more adjustments to Christianity in the future? It seems like the last adjustments were Scientology and the Mormons or The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. These religions don't exactly follow what Paul started in the Roman Catholic Church. What will the next adjustment be and why will it be necessary?

If you choose to follow Christianity, how do you know which church is right, I mean their core beliefs are right, aren't they. To love your neighbor and be compassionate. To show kindness towards others and help the needy. Do you think that we're going to have to adjust this one day and start treating certain religious followers, whose skin color is deference or speaks a different language with cruelty. I wonder what the next adjustment in Christianity is going to be.

Men Problems Christianity

You are free to copy this article to your site as long as you include the following resource information with an active link to my site:

Greg Vanden Berge is a published author, internet marketing expert, motivational inspiration to millions of people all over the world and is sharing some of his wisdom with experts in the fields of writing,marketing, and personal development.

Greg is currently working on a self help library filled with great subjects on a wide array of topics, like religion, self help and spiritual changes in the world. His views on religious freedom are slowly changing the way people think about institutional religion.